Fighting with nightmare

I like to draw. I like the moment with pencils when my imagination blows out. Sometimes I have a precise intention, and sometimes I let things go to be surprised by the result. Playing with the subconscious is fun and deep at the same time.

But drawing isnโ€™t my hobby since childhood. Of course I did draw at that time, perhaps only until school. Then the system was trying to form my skills, telling me how much wrong I was. And believe me, I was!

Luckily I had other skills to develop, so I didnโ€™t suffer much because of drawing bad. I had other things to enjoy and erased my need to draw from the mind. Before 40, the suppressed need woke up and started to fill my hungry hole.

Sounds the story is done, right?

But I quickly discovered that although I draw happily and felt free, in fact I had avoided drawing people all the time. And if I did it, it was a real nightmare. Finally I decided to fight with it!

Since January, I have been engaged in learning how to do it. My goal is not to reach professional skills, I just want to overcome my fear and remove the obstacle of the free self-expression.

The drawing above is the last practice and I believe that the head finally got the right proportions! What do you think?

With love, Ivana


7 thoughts on “Fighting with nightmare

    1. Thank you!!!
      It was a strange process, started by common doodle with the only target – catching the right proportions. Then the face became more and more alive.. I didn’t know the woman, she was born by pencils ๐Ÿ˜Š

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Your drawings look great, I was thinking they were paintings, in fact.
    My personal point is that when somebody can draw, they can draw anything.
    I was straight the opposite, I earned a lot of support money drawing people and portraits about 4 decades ago. I don’t draw from photos, I simply didn’t have camera until 46 when I relocated to Canada, so, I always e that person to sit or stand or whatever. I love drawing from real things which I most often do. That’s why I love still life which is my favorite. My husband used to joke we didn’t eat anything for a month while I was painting a large still life since it consisted of different eatables, etc.
    I’ve been teaching drawing for a long time, too. I think there is no wrong age or no good age to start doing it. As a medical researcher I know that people who spend time drawing by middle age are at 75% less risk to develop dementia or Alzheimer’s. Such data is not widely popular because it’s easier to take a pill and hope for great outcome.
    If any adult and kid spent as much time as they spend scrolling through the internet with pencil or brush, we would be much happier and mentally healthier society.
    As soon as I saw your rather paintings, not drawings, I really liked them. There is a big difference between only technically perfect art and art that comes from soul.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for such nice and encouraging words! I really appreciate them especially as I know you are very experienced artist.
      I didn’t know there exists serious research of relation between drawing and mental health! It sounds great! I feel happier when drawing. And good to know that I’m working against future mental illnesses at the same time. Thanks for giving me this argument ๐Ÿ™‚
      And best greetings to your husband, his comment makes me laugh! I “see” you over full bags from supermarket, selecting food like edible and not edible according to its artistic value ๐Ÿ™‚


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