What’s wrong?

I’ve been walking through the colorful landscape, accumulating sunshine of amazing Indian summer, and suddenly came to me a burden of emotions, requiring immediate drawing. Fortunately, I was ready for a similar situation, having a pencil and paper in my backpack. Sometimes it’s exhausting to use nature as a partner for spiritual conversation 😊

Still in the heart of landscape, I drew a rough sketch and was surprised how the original intention developed. My first emotional load was supplemented in a breathtaking way, which was ugly and true at the same time.

I had to draw a bigger sized picture in colors just after returning home, but nothing could change the story that screamed from the depth of my soul.

The lovely proclamations and prayers are directed to the sunflower instead of the sun and the pink lady opens heart to the whole world except to the person with whom she’s connected.

And the other person is shivering in the cold directly under sun, waiting for apology and satisfaction, instead of taking luggage and leaving the board.

Both are stuck together and both are waiting for the other to change. Nobody’s happy. What’s wrong?

I sent a question for solution to the universe and immediately got the answer. I’m going to draw it in colors, but the sketch is already done. Do you have tips what might be there? 😊

Hope you like the picture even though it’s not much about hope.

With love, Ivana

Advertisements

To be connected

Following my last advice, I turn attention to the faith. Although I’m not a part of any religion officially, my heart speaks Hebrew.

I have no preconditions to it from the family, it came to me in dreams many years ago and since that I’ve confirmed a strong response of my soul and heart to the sound of the Hebrew language in various circumstances, even though I didn’t understand a single word in the beginning.

I’m still on the way of searching how to implement this fact into my daily life and not to pretend anything. Maybe I’m not fast enough and this is why the violet color sits deep in the wardrobe full of dust.

So I returned to the picture I drew a few years ago, when I was trying to catch my vision of the commandments inside of the tree of life.

I have meditated over this drawing last days and it seems to me, that each of us is a kind of smart-phone with the spiritual crown instead of antenna, constantly sending messages about true personal stuff to the whole universe with stars as transmitters.

It doesn’t matter how colorful and funny things are displayed to other people, the truth is preciously mined and sent to the attention of HaShem.

Sometimes it’s hard to believe when you get no direct answer, but the point is to keep trying and stay connected, right?

With love and apology for my Hebrew handwriting,

Ivana

Taste of colors

Have you ever wondered how the colors smell and taste? I am sure they have their own energy that is not easy to exactly perceive, but we can play with associations. I will take a risk and show my inner self by giving you an example.

Red, when I close my eyes and ask for red, I feel the blood – wet and sticky blood with ferocious taste on my tongue. Something bleeds and calls the fragility on the border between life and death. My second attempt for red was juicy fruits of red color with a large amount of seed inside. This time life and fertility have beaten death 😋 But still I feel a kind of potential danger in red. It might taste great, I stay in alert.

Yellow. I smell the freshness of the lemon, but its sour taste is balanced by a ton of honey. Sweet and fresh sour mixed together, that’s how I taste the yellow. Yellow is the light why I’m not afraid to go to a dark cellar.  Yellow is the tool through which I can see the truth, even it could bring a huge shock.

Blue is an ocean at night, wide and deep, full of dark secrets. I feel how cold and wet the blue is. Anyway, for me the blue doesn’t represent the purity because I’m fully aware of millions microorganism living there. Plus I feel the salinity inside of blue and each grain of salt means the impurity which separates sterility from viable environment, with too high salinity of death on the opposite side. For me, the blue brings the alchemy of living environment or better to say how much secrets and impurities are acceptable in our lives.

Orange is a sun for me. I feel friendly sunshine on my skin or even a hot sunny day in the middle of desert. Orange is always smiling in my imagination, enjoying every second of life. Orange is fun, a sense of humor, a celebration of life alone and with friends. Orange is a must otherwise you would fall into sadness or depression.

Violet makes me feel lavender in the old cabinet, in which the spiritual robe hangs and only lavender prevents moths from destroying it. In my image the violets is full of grey as if the dust covered the spirituality.

And finally green, this is the place where I can freely run and truly be who I am. I smell all the shades of the forest, the resin of the conifers that improves my breathing and breaks the boundaries of my options in life. Inside of green, I can always touch my heart and read what is written inside.

So, this is my honest imagination of colors at the moment, I’m staying naked in front of you.  I’ll tell you next time how to read it, how to detect a possible problem and how to bring some harmony into it. Would you like to guess? Feel free to write comments, I’m curious. And if you like to share your imagination through colors, I will be honored.

With love, Ivana

Kissing under blossoms

My knowledge of traditions isn’t great, and I’m also not sure where the tradition ends and the superstition starts. But they say that May is the month of love and a kiss under blooming tree confirms the love of two. And maybe that’s why the wedding ceremony sometimes takes place under the blooming gate.

The truth is, that blooming trees in May bring splendid beauty that takes breath and touches heart. The blossoms are mostly white or pale pink which corresponds to purity and love. All together promise juicy fruit in the future and what else can we desire for our love.

From that point I understand the habit of kissing lover under blooming tree and the romantic part of my soul likes the idea. But it seems that everything is subject to evolution. And I met a shocking evidence of it yesterday.

At that time my heart and soul were filled with the beauty of nature, I was returning from the walk through the blooming landscape where butterflies of many kinds accompanied my steps and the herbalist inside me had a full bag of hawthorn flowers, pine sprouts, nettles, etc.

And then, on the parking place near my home, a car stopped and two young people stepped out, engine running. There was nothing but concrete and a thin tree with few blossoms that had been planted a week ago. The young lovers quickly kissed each other and left immediately. It took about 2 minutes, but I am still in shock.

It looked like a duty, as if they checked an item on their “to do list”: to buy a bread, to kiss a partner, to make exercise. Hurry to get it all. Suddenly I felt sad and old.

Is this picture of time? Is the life so accelerated that there is not enough time for beauty and love? Do we need to make important events up to 5 steps from the car?

Yet I wish to the two young people that their love would be stronger than the tree they chose.

Ivana

Obsessed with sour taste

Although winter wasn’t strong this year, we expect another wave of frosty weather next week. My body is already exhausted from endless wait for spring and more and more often calls for sour taste.

On the scale of tastes I usually prefer the bitter one. Sweet probably occupies the second place. Salty is in the middle, sometimes alternating with the sweet. But spicy and sour are definitely in the end of my selection with the only exception. When spring slowly awakes from winter sleep, I am obsessed with sour taste. I need to add some acidity to every meal and it doesn’t matter if it’s sweet or salty.

At this time, sour taste helps me to overcome the last winter days, it keeps me enough alive. What coffee makes for mind in the morning, the sour does for body before spring definitely comes.

Now, the opportunity to really use what I’ve done before came.

Rosehip chips are simple, tasty and sour enough to keep you from eating so much of them. Actually, I made them by accident. I originally wanted to make jam, but I harvested more fruits than I had sugar. So I cooked and mashed the rosehips without sugar, pushed through the sieve, placed a thin layer on a sheet and dried in oven at low temperature. Efficiency isn’t high, but I don’t like to waste the harvest.

Except of lemon, what do you imagine under sour taste? Yes, vinegar!

Perhaps some or most of you have tried to make homemade apple vinegar. It’s nothing complicated as soon as you have apples, big jar and patience.

Based on the same technology, I made also other kinds of vinegar – from the hawthorn berries and from elderberries. And I must say – I love both of them!

Homemade vinegars are great as they are, or you can add some herbs to extend their taste and flavor.

I have three types of apple vinegar – with common wormwood (Artemisia vulgaris), rosemary and onion skins. They are great fresh or cooked, for eat or hair rising.

The hawthorn vinegar is a kind of medicine as well, having a tonic effect for heart and blood pressure. I divided the final amount into three parts – pure hawthorn, with sage and with speedwell (Veronica officinalis), which also helps to keep heart and veins in healthy condition.

But the elderberry vinegar, it’s a treasure! I love even to watch it! It looks like a good red wine or magical elixir. I feel the taste in every cell of my body, awaking me for life. I put it into porridge in the morning, into the soup at noon and into legumes in the evening. As I said, I’m really obsessed!

I’m going to make bigger amount this year, especially after I used the elderberry vinegar instead of lemon juice into the herbal candies. I mixed it with cloves, cinnamon and star anis and it became a heaven in the mouth! They were gone before I took a photo, so you have to imagine or make it yourself 😀

What kind of sour ingredients do you like? I would appreciate more inspiration for my actual obsession. Thanks in advance!

With love, Ivana

Happy birthday!

In these days, a lot of my friends celebrate their birthday and unlike previous years, I will not have the opportunity to celebrate with them. Life is a continuous evolution, and there is nothing more to do than to accept it. So, even at a distance, happy birthday to all of you!

I was born in the Scorpio sign as well, and my birthday is coming next Saturday. As always, around my birthday, I feel some change of energy flow in my life. It is an undefined tension, like when you have a tremor before the show. I have already learned to accept it as a fact and not to worry about it.

But still I am the person of many questions and I like to discover at least the clue to a hidden mystery. Due to a regularity of the energy flow changes around my birthday I have been looking for answers or explanations. The pattern of numbers and tarot cards gives me a kind of understanding what is hidden beneath.

Now, I am going to enter the energy of the Hanged man in the big cycle of Lovers. Briefly it means the energy of dead ends in the area of relationships. Yes, it helps me to accept zero celebrations with my friends this year. And I have felt the necessity to change my friends’ portfolio for some time, but I am a conservative person who doesn’t like to lose what cares about. But again, life is an evolution and we cannot keep everything to block the stream.

The Hanged man card contains a message. You see the world upside down and you have to change your angle of view radically to heal yourself. It is useless to continue on the same path because it doesn’t lead to anywhere. That would be head against the wall.

And this is something difficult to accept, even though I am well aware that the Hanged man card is the shadow that precedes release and abundance. There must to be a sacrifice to bring the result. This is a historical formula that can be applied up today. But still it hurts.

And that’s why my mood is not cheerful and my post lacks a joke. I hope it will improve soon!

But still with love,

Ivana

Dreaming of summer lounging

Fortunately, I live in a relatively safe part of the world, considering weather and socio-political climate. In the middle of Europe we usually do not have hurricanes or tornados. But today, we had a really strong wind here, perhaps the strongest in the last ten years. Power supply was interrupted in many places, many trees suddenly fell down and two of them even ended human lives.

I spent my day safe at home, watching the raging wind behind the window. I felt anxiety for all the people outside, thinking about the nature of this weather.

A strong wind struggles to bridge extremely different pressures in the atmosphere, and the desire to balance is so strong that it takes everything what stands in its way. It is not so different from a human nature. Many people hate conflicts, so they are trying to bridge the enemy pressures among others. They use themselves to prevent the storm of strong words or even real fights. But is it possible to keep the storm in a garage forever?

I am sad for all the trees that have been so suddenly defeated from their roots, and I am naturally sad for the human lives that have been so suddenly ended. But something deeply inside tells me that the storm was like a blow of the truth. It was the unpleasant blow of the unpleasant truth, which is exactly what we usually try to avoid.

We usually prefer to dream of harmony and happiness, even if they do not stand on completely true foundations. I personally do not believe that our life is a journey into paradise in terms of endless lounging. I do believe that the path of life is a sinusoid, where the pulses alternate up and down in the rhythm that G-d has in his hands.

We can only do our best to have love, compassion and strength in our hearts to overcome consequences of the tornados, coming into our lives. And try not to make useless storms.

With love, Ivana