Sleeping summer

There are people who come to life with the sun and have almost no limits. On the contrary, my body switches to hibernation as soon as it’s too hot or hot for too long. And it has been so over the past few weeks!

I was paralyzed by the weather and worked only on autopilot as if I was drugged. Feeling sleepy, but without possibility of true sleep at night. Who would call it cooling when the daytime temperature in the shade is the same as the temperature of human body, and at midnight it is only ten degrees less? For weeks! And they forecast the hot hell will continue…

Luckily, some rain came today and brought happiness to my soul. I walked (not danced) in the rain and absorbed the drops by the whole surface of my body. It was so different from common shower. Although the shower was more comfortable, the rain today was more cleansing because it touched not only the body but also the soul, perhaps because I was so thirsty for it.

Later I noticed that the portion of today’s rain was nothing for the nature around. The soil remained dry and cracked, the fallen water somehow disappeared. Berries stay dried on the bush, sadly announcing low to zero harvest. And the leaves on the trees become yellow and start to fall as if autumn was already there.

One must be happy for a little thing and I’m looking forward to a nice sleep today, if possible without thinking of tomorrow’s hell.

Wishing you a pleasant summer,

Ivana

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Being happy

Originally, I wrote a post called “Out of Eden”, wandering if everything was great and joyful in paradise, while outside it was only sweat, blood and thistle. But then, even my drawing looked too depressing. So, I slightly changed the angle.

During last days I’ve met several people who couldn’t find their joy. It was lost and they couldn’t remember anything what would make them happy. Some of them even blamed me I wasn’t able to understand because I have so many interests – sources of happiness. At that moment, it seemed that joy was a crime. As if the existence of joy meant the absence of problems.

It didn’t make sense to explain that I feel drowned in troubles sometimes. But I insist on my right to joy anyway. I cultivate my small sources of joy everyday, because they help me to overcome mistakes and suffering that are part of everybody’s life.

Finally, I realized that medicine is not the number of interests and activities, although they can help. The most important thing is to start reacting spontaneously, freeing joy from the fortress of control and social conventions.

And the truth is, I’ve always been a little rebel in this field. I laughed at places where it didn’t fit. Sometimes it was more cramping than real joy, but smiling has been part of my life philosophy for many years. And sometimes it’s really difficult to find a smile, but it doesn’t mean I’m not trying to do it.

So, today I announce a revolt against sadness and I’m sending the picture of a crazy joy to all who want to smile at least a little.

With joy and love, Ivana

Dreaming of summer lounging

Fortunately, I live in a relatively safe part of the world, considering weather and socio-political climate. In the middle of Europe we usually do not have hurricanes or tornados. But today, we had a really strong wind here, perhaps the strongest in the last ten years. Power supply was interrupted in many places, many trees suddenly fell down and two of them even ended human lives.

I spent my day safe at home, watching the raging wind behind the window. I felt anxiety for all the people outside, thinking about the nature of this weather.

A strong wind struggles to bridge extremely different pressures in the atmosphere, and the desire to balance is so strong that it takes everything what stands in its way. It is not so different from a human nature. Many people hate conflicts, so they are trying to bridge the enemy pressures among others. They use themselves to prevent the storm of strong words or even real fights. But is it possible to keep the storm in a garage forever?

I am sad for all the trees that have been so suddenly defeated from their roots, and I am naturally sad for the human lives that have been so suddenly ended. But something deeply inside tells me that the storm was like a blow of the truth. It was the unpleasant blow of the unpleasant truth, which is exactly what we usually try to avoid.

We usually prefer to dream of harmony and happiness, even if they do not stand on completely true foundations. I personally do not believe that our life is a journey into paradise in terms of endless lounging. I do believe that the path of life is a sinusoid, where the pulses alternate up and down in the rhythm that G-d has in his hands.

We can only do our best to have love, compassion and strength in our hearts to overcome consequences of the tornados, coming into our lives. And try not to make useless storms.

With love, Ivana