In the middle of lockdown

Since the covid pandemic invaded our lives, we have all experienced a number of restrictions and strange situations, as well as suffering or even death of our loved ones. We learned how to wear masks and read facial expressions only from eye wrinkles, when we are lucky enough to meet in person.

Staying at home, we are overwhelmed by the endless flow of catastrophic news and / or senseless political quarrels about things they cannot understand. Sometimes I feel that this is worse than the pandemic itself. Mentally and emotionally, I am tired of it.

Then, it is completely out of my comprehension how health professionals can handle such situation for more than a year. On a daily basis, they keep dressing up in protective spacesuits and fighting for lives. Unlike the rest of us, they don’t have time to complain.

Whenever I remember their work, I am ashamed of my petty complaints about how I cannot breathe through the mask, and I do my best to be obedient to all the restrictions. Although the current lockdown is very strict and many people are trying to get around it.

The pandemic also brought me something good or I should say great. It’s been exactly a year since I decided to buy a brush and paints and start watercolor painting. All the pandemic limitations gave me freedom to learn and try. And I believe that once the horror of covid-19 is over, I will remember the times of the pandemic in connection with my watercolor beginnings.

I would like to think that we keep the better memories if we can choose.

Recently, I learned how to draw and paint droplets. The first example doesn’t need a comment, the second one should be a tribute to the upcoming St. Patrick’s Day. I hope the shamrock is clear but who would recognize that beer foam is covering the top? I still have some work to do. And I will be happy to do it, especially in the middle of lockdown.

Love and hugs,

Ivana

Always watched

Recently I felt lonely, so I was looking for relaxation in drawing. Putting confidence into my intuition and the ally of colored pencils, I was curious about the outcome.

And voila! Soon it became clear that I was drawing an eye. Why? I didn’t care at that time. I just kept drawing and stopped feeling lonely. Something new was being born and it gave me company.

As the drawing grew more and more precise, the more relaxed I felt. As if the eye knew all my pain and sadness, as if it contained all understanding and wisdom.

Although the drawing isn’t proportionally perfect, it has become my beloved friend and supporter in difficult times. Although my human friends call it sad, stressed or even chaotic, I still love it.

Hope you’d feel some impact as well. Double hope it’s positive!
Love, Ivana

I became a deviant!

I have to repeat it again, because I cannot believe it. I have always considered myself as a decent woman with the only deviation – love for nature and herbs. So how did it happen to become a real deviant?

Long ago, I began to think about placing my drawings in a suitable part of cyberspace. Just to have them together and perhaps to get encouragement when I need it. And maybe my drawings could provide good mood to someone else who needs a bit of optimism.

I have checked various platforms and something kept me coming back to the server that my mind aversively refused. I would call my drawings naive, childish, non-educated, too colorful, but deviant?

I fought a long inner battle with labeling and prejudice, trying to find another alternative all the time. But the group of deviants attracted me beyond my control, so I gave up last week and became one of them. Still I cannot used to hear someone called me a deviant and my drawings deviations, but I work on it.

I slowly orient myself in a new environment and re-discover the old truth that every environment is like a pot of soup. You will find nice pieces of vegetable or meat, but also a lot of dirty water. It is  up to you what to join. And I hope to be a carrot there 😊

Although I add my pictures to the gallery slowly and you probably have seen many of them already, I would like to invite you to my small deviant exhibition here.

Thanks for coming!

Ivana